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$99 Births The VENUS

(30 minutes of what's been voted far-

and-away the best BBBJ in GTA)

$185 Girths The PENIS

(Everything else & DBLS your time)

"Better than anyone I've ever known!

Dynamite! Just Dynamite!"

-- GUMPER

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THIS SITE IS NOT MEANT TO BE VIEWED ON A PHONE

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GIRLS NIGHT...IN...DEEPER DAMMIT!
APRIL 7, 2021 (#1)
In Canada, there's not really
any kind of SORORITY in
university life. Americans seem
to have many...issues with ex-
clusivity the rest of the world
does not have. In other words
they're prejudiced. Skin color,
weight, hairstyle, race, religion
you name it they find a way to
make it a basis on which you
are rejected or accepted in
whatever circles you can ima-
gine! In Canada there's not
even really an 'acceptance'
process to university at all!
If you've got what is a pittance
compared to the U.S. cost of
a college education -- you're
IN! People aren't vying for
spots and bribing officials.
Call us 'socialists' but we never
created such...hostile habits.
I've been the brunt of much
racism in Canada but nothing
like that! Girls do tend to be
more 'FILTERING' about their
socializing but we don't make
another girl eat us out to "get
in" and, girls in Canada don't
want IN anywhere enough to
eat anyone out. On the other
hand Canadian girls are more
likely to just eat you out
for fun because we aren't
hung up on sexual stigmas
Americans lend to everything
because frankly...they're 
PRUDES about sex. Torture &
bloodshed...yes...but they'd
never show a boob/butt let
alone a penis. I don't know any
girls who don't at least oc-
casionally make out with other
girls. Most do more. Covid
can't kill the kind of sexual
freedom we have compared
to the U.S. Let's keep it that
way. No joke! No jive!
JUST DON'T ACTUALLY KNOCK YOURSELF OUT!
OK...A LITTLE JIVE!
CRUSHED ON HER/HER VOICE
HARD TO BELIEVE
SHE THINKS SHE'S UGLY
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APRIL 7, 2021 (#2)
I feel badly for anyone who's
never CRUSHED-OUT on some-
one! I'm not sure if it indicates
they're healthy or maybe a lil
abnormal, because I think it's
a pretty common thing. Maybe
they're even a lil sociopathic.
I don't think I'd ever get
profoundly involved with any-
one who hadn't crushed-out
and/or been dumped by
someone for whom they're
thereafter pining enough to
swing by their house to see
if they were out in the yard
or write letters to or dreamt
about 6 months later. At least
once in their lives! Not
'Stalker'-level stuff! We're all
crushing out on the Freedom
we miss and used to have
which is what inspired the
RUSSIAN idea, because even
Russians now enjoy a Free-
dom they once didn't. But
maybe it's a good time to
appreciate what we had
& still have (minus the temp
Covid curbs). I'm desperately
missing the freedom to se-
duce my Uber delivery-man
(and a few girls before CV)
and still wanna get groped
by a stranger waiting for a
redlight! I hate having to be
selective/stringent about
everything erotic! Damn, it
sucks! And not in the sexy
way I do! Sigh. It's HUMP
DAY! So let's shake off the
doldrums and try to laugh!
I vote 3 STOOGES, GET
SMART & JACKASS!
It pays to primal scream in
the streets! Psychiatrically
that is! ROOAAAAARRR!
A PERFECT SONG!
JUST AN HOUR TO BE HERE WITH ME
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APRIL 7, 2021 (#3)
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New photos, videos and
adventures await! The challenge
is to recalibrate our entire
approach to a skewed new
world! I'm READY BABY!
Bring it on!
As always I'll be waiting until
next Easter before I mention
the 'Easter Eggs' hidden on the
site so HAPPY HUNTING!
APRIL 6, 2021 #2
LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!
Ooooooh Those Russians!
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APRIL 6, 2021 #2
Russian isn't a difficult language to learn to
speak but with Cyrillic, it's not always
easy to read/write. But Russians are
like you and I in their ability to be stupid/
clumsy and have what's now been
globally-termed 'epic fails'. My first trip
to Iceland back in 2016 I was with several
people all 'polar-bearing' (which is
BOMBS-AWAYing into insanely-icy water.
As most know, I didn't even learn how to swim until I was 20 & was terrified
to even stand in water with my face (and only my face) in the water. I've cum
a long way (yes that sounds deliciously dirty). Peer pressure is a good thing in
my book -- it helps us all do things we'd otherwise be too chickensh*t to do.
So in I went, BUTT-NAKED but not before first slipping on the edge of the
ice and landing naked-butt-first on the ice and more sliding in than jumping.
(VIPS can now find the 7min edit of the event in "JOKER'S WILD" tab).
I've Polar-Bear'd 3 times since then but it IS a JOLT to the biology and
this spring I decided to bow out even though I actually really wanted to do it.
Rushing-in to crazy, silly antics is the best way to do them. A fierce and
COWABUNGA attitude is always good. Why not FLIX-REC FOOLS RUSH IN,
BEAVIS/BUTTHEAD DO AMERICA, BAD INFLUENCE. Then remember...
do something everyday that scares you. Water's still icy...as people still
sometimes say...why don't you go jump in a lake! Джеронимо!!
SORRY BUT I LOVE THIS SONG
TIME TO CHANGE THE RULES NOW
VENUS KIM NOVAK'S PAINTINGS AS BEAUTIFUL AS SHE WAS
D.'s musical hommage to KIM 2016
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APRIL 6, 2021 #1
If there's anything better than pulling an inside
straight (that sounds dirty...is it dirty?) it's drawing
both jokers to fill a ROYAL FLUSH! I'm NOT a
good poker player. I can't bluff and I've got a bad
poker face. But it's still fun to play. I'm more of a
Rummoli gal. It's like 3 games in 1. That sounds
dirty...is it dirty? I'm bummed my Bucket-F*ckit List
is on hold, but I can shuffle a deck of cards a bit
better. If you haven't seen KNIFE OF ICE -- even
WILDSTYLED!!
if it's from1972, it dares to go where SCREAM never did in multiple
sequels. All the WILD ideas have been put on hold now in LIFE. Only a
FOOL would wander around the GTA, gather, take a train etc. So I spend
all my time out of the house IN the WILD, relishing the woods, waterfront,
empty parks. Good time to rediscover simplicity. I've retooled my retro
table-top videogame to semi-upright so my eyes aren't over-taxed by the
reflective glass. Now...I can work the joystick and push those little red
buttons (ok, those are both definitely dirty!) and BOMB JACK
(again...why does everything sound dirty today?!) and get my space
invaded (see?!?!) without being bent over the table (ok ok ok c'mon!!!!).
Let's try JOKER'S WILD (aka Joker's Poltergeist) with Eric Roberts (who, btw,
has an insanely-long filmography compared to sis) and find out if it's awful!
Then YOUTUBE some 70s JOKER'S WILD game show and maybe some 60s
(120 episodes) BATMAN with Cesar Romero as Joker. Make sure you get
out into the sun or rain and dance, spin, lose or win...take it on the chin...
OK...is Tuesday just a dirty dirty day?!!? I'll take it in my mouth thank you!
No innuendo/entendre/euphamism needed. I love cum!
LIKE I SAID LOCOFOCO
ISNT THIS GUY PERSONA NON GRATA?
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"Venus ain't got nothing on Amy.
She's fun, down to earth, full of life
and the best at what she does.
What she does is more sophisticated
than just sex. Way more! She loves
to just chat, listen, giggle and cuddle.
She's right there with you the whole
time, not thinking about the clock.
There's a real and layered person
there and you truly know it.
Not a goddess, but damn close."
-- Bolero,  April 3, 2021
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MAKE SOME SEXY MEMORIES
APRIL 5, 2021 (#1)
Armchair quarterbacks argue
the obvious, the rhetorical --
If they'd simple shut-down the
whole world for 60 days a year
ago, we'd all be living in a
COVID-FREE world by now
joking about it. Sigh. But here
we are in another LD not a
HOP skip and jump away
from the last. They're simply
not learning from any mis-
takes no matter how recent.
So I'm extending my
SCARLET CARSON, inviting
as many as half a dozen to
grab the spots while they
last. Think of it as the match
that set the world -- or at
least your lust -- on fire!
I've hesitated mentioning it
in 99/100 posts, or posting
any reviews whatsoever but
it looks like LOCKDOWN is
the new lowdown and we
all best bury any ideas of
exploring the world any time
soon. So...may as well get
the kindling lit...and sidle up
to the hearth...looks like it's
gunna be a cold spring.
Moonlight in THE GARDEN
OF EXCESS has begun.....
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"Been using this Scarlet Carson for a

couple weeks and can't stop

jerking off! Scarlet (Amy) is such a

wild girl and her friends are

a wild lot and they're not trying

too hard to tun me on because

they're doing it pretty naturally."

-- Henzo, Dec 4, 2020

LIPS LIKE ROSE PETALS
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LET'S JUST....BREATHE
APRIL 5, 2021 (#2)
Can never get enough of
PEARL JAM! Eddie's just
one of the true music
LOVERS...his little speech at
the awards years ago about
how it saved his life was so
powerfully sincere. Let's not
the lockdown CHILL your
WILLY...or your heart or your
hope & faith that we will all
surface from this cold-spell
warm and even sweaty!
Meanwhile, my hot breath &
even hotter...........wink.......
is being vigilant in its
screening and selectivity.
I know whom I can rely on
just as you do. I still get out
everyday Into The Wild --
an awesome movie for
which EDDIE did the sound-
track -- away from any and
all risk/human contact to
feed and interact with the
deer, geese, ducks, turkeys,
squirrels, assorted birds &
the sea-n-sails of my Aloha
which requires VAST heat
at night (bbbbrrrrrrr!!!) and
stilly rolling down my hilly
and spinning in the sun,
even egg-hunting for Easter
and showering in my gar-
den shower until I can plant
some flowers. Today's a
great day for some SILLY
instead to warm the
CHILLY so this dilly of a
philly & laugh willy-nilly
hoping for a drilly and a
thrilly! Let's do HOTSPOT,
CLUB DREAD, COCKTAIL
(Wish it was about both of
those!) & OMG...ISLANDS
IN THE SUN!!! Heat the
feet-n-meat! (giggle)
OR IS THAT JUST YOU?
V. MAE'S KICKASS "WARM AIR"
Shoyu Vapors
APRIL 5, 2021 #3
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When it comes to beauty,
say what you want about the
Japanese but they may lead
the way in not only preserving
the elegance and aesthetics
of their history/culture, they
set a pretty high bar when
it comes to keeping their
waters/beaches pristine/
crystalline and using alterna-
tive energy to fossil fuels.
KABUKI theater has been around
since the 17th Century and is a
gorgeous aesthetic pageantry of
precision and cultural drama.
Though American in origin,
THE MIKADO is hilarious & fun
and been in production for
125 years! 美しくあなた自身
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Fuzzy tail, fuzzy-bunny
slippers, fuzzy bunny ears,
little chick basket, poofy
chick plushee...............
HOPPY EASTER!!!!
If you're not into the kids'
cartoons/specials you can
try EASTER PARADE,
religious fare like THE
GREATEST STORY EVER
TOLD, THE BODY,
or just movies that salute
SACRIFICE like MAN ON
FIRE, ARMAGEDDON
Then love in action today...
sacrifice....a little!
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APRIL 4, 2021
THREE HOT CHICKS
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SUGARFALL -- LOVE PARADE (Feat. A-Me)
<== HERE I AM SINGING AGAIN! Still no comment?
Everyone knows now how I do so enjoy chal-
lenging the religious right re: silly, archaic
doctrine -- especially those allegedly related
to 'scripture'. There's not a single instance in
the Bible about incest being wrong. Not one.
It goes on and on about many things, but
never once claims it's wrong. In fact, there's
plenty of support including Lot's daughters
plying their father to sleep with him (& they
were the approved-by-God that escaped
Sodom) and, of course, Adam/Eve's off-
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SWEETEST TABU
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APRIL 4, 2021 #2
spring had to 'fornicate' for you and I to be here! The simple fact is, the incest
taboo was created not by religion but by simple anthropological organization,
in order to keep men from fighting over the women. Of course, pro-creating
is far from a good idea, but the SEX itself? I mean it's HAF and FUN and has
EXPLODED over the last years; certainly being in the vocation I'm in for fun,
I have inside 411 most don't have access to so, trust me when I tell you....
it's a craze and why not? Of all the people in the world to share/enjoy
the best invention ever with -- it's family! Those on KIK can ask me about my
personal, sizzling experiences &, regardless of what people tell others (or even
themselves)...........everyone has a mindblowing fantasy/desire to do it. Xianity
has zero scriptural basis for the taboo. Same goes with masturbation!
Not one verse on the subject! Not one! The 'Onanism' ref (a single verse!)
has nothing to do with masturbation (in fact, he's actually having intercourse
with a woman at the time!!) but with him disobeying God/duty to impregnate
her! Xianity/the church is frigging INSANE! Ignorant yes, archaic yes,
and, let's face it, useless. Most church buildings stand empty 164 hours
of 168/week while homeless/hungry/lost people suffer! ok...I'm done.
Our 'sunday best' is better-suited to sleeping with the family members
who would sit next to us in pews every sunday! Everyone would get along
a lot better if FUN FUN FUN sex replaced church-aerobics (sit, kneel,
stand, kneel, stand, sit...). I vote everyone do it with everyone! So
when someone says WHODUNNIT? Everyone done it! One of my top 10
'goto' silly wonderful awesome flix: CLUE! LOVE  IT! HILARIOUS! 
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Where it's sunny and fun to drizzle your honey on my bunny!
Hey ROCKY! Watch me pull a rabbit out of my HAT?! That sounds dirty
is it dirty? It's (GOOD?SATURDAY PLAYTIME again -- time to visit all the
silly, awesome culture I missed being a loser-millennial (curse my
parents for not f*cking me into existence earlier!)
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I was never a BUGS fan because the whole savvy
mobster attitude and moxy just seemed wrong/
out-of-place for a toon. He enjoyed tormenting
people a little too much. But there are some
epic BUGS moments including THE BARBER
OF SEVILLE (which I'm cool with only because
ELMER was trying to kill him). Still...I guess
I'm just a softee, bleeding-heart liberal re:
toons. They're for KIDS! They should be soft!
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And with that softness in mind...like the XMAS
stop-motion elegance of a lost era I missed,
PETER COTTONTAIL still stands as a great story
about laziness and complacency in a world
where LOVE requires effort and sacrifice -- two
things sadly missing in most millennials...
Maybe because parents simply stopped parenting
and left a half dozen generations without any
guidance about such things. I'm embarrassed that
my generation has now been defined as the
"WHATEVER!" generation...and accurately so.
I wish I could apologize for everyone else.
I can only say...I chose a different path. Thankfully!
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That brings us to HONEYBUNNY...Bugs' ex-GIRLFRIEND.
Was she hot? Well, they weren't exactly trying to turn kids on with toons
back in those days so if she was, they restrained her sexuality under
some clothing. But y'know what they say about bunnies and F*CKING!
So I assume BUGS was getting around and HONEY was a HONEYTRAP
of her own! I'd hate to think what those CHOMPERS could do! YIKES!
I don't ever remember seeing HONEY in any toons but then there's
so much I missed so I hope she wasn't a GANSTER-type!
Since I just posted about my previous trips to Australia, it should be
noted the myxoma virus, which causes myxomatosis, that was
introduced into the rabbit population in the 1950s was not trying to
reduce cartoons; but the bunnies in MY YARD -- almost as cute as toons!

MARCH 3, 2021

But everyone should grow up reading the
original 1922 version of
THE VELVETEEN RABBIT
(one of my favorite books) which my mother
read to me growing up and which D.
bought me (book and stuffed)
several years ago and I've protected
with my life. It means that much to me!
Remember...only LOVE makes you real...and it
comes with some wear/tear and sacrifice.
THE VELVETEEN RABBIT (Pt 1) -- ARB Meryl Streep
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“Only with Amy can I book a two hour

session and when it's time to go

I can't believe it's over already!

And not a single thing to criticize  - -

it was a perfect two hours with a

perfectly beautiful companion!”

— Bluebro69, March 31, 2021

PHOTO: APRIL, 2017

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BEAM, BABY BEAM!
APRIL 2, 2021 (#1)
On August 19th, 1970 Zsa Zsa
Gabor was robbed of what was
then over $600, 000 worth of
jewelry, thereafter sworn to a
lifetime of FAKE jewels to en-
sure there was no repeat.
KIM K. was robbed of more
than $6 mill! It's easy for ppl
to chase the chingy dragon,
but it's much better to collect
the glitter of character and
memories, accomplishments
and acumen. Losing anything
valuable is no joke! Ever won-
dered where the term 'Joshing'
originated? It's a FASCINATING
story involving a crafty deaf
guy and some subtle trickery.
READ THIS! Trust me!
There's a lot of FOOL'S GOLD
available to us, but HAPPINESS
can usually be found behind
DOOR #3 -- the human heart!
As we go into this EASTER
weekend, most of us will not
give much notice of the re-
ligious history and -- for me --
I'll be hunting for chocolate
eggs with friends/lovers.
I'll be enjoying my HERE
COMES PETER COTTON-
TAIL (1971) and a few other
cutesy comforts, but I will be
taking stock of where I want
my character to go this
spring before I HOP along
into it, ensuring I'm searching
not for Iron Pyrite but THE
REAL THING (and I don't mean
coca-cola!) As a widow I know
better than most that not
only can you not take it with
you...but we don't really get
and genuine HAPPINESS from
it while we have it. It's kind of
a silly joke...a red-herring...a
trick really! Even if there were
a pot-o-gold at the end of the
rainbow...it's promise is a
mirage...like the rainbow!
Build a rainbow in your heart
and OF YOURSELF...and
SHINE SHINE SHINE! 
ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU'RE GOLD!
GOD, KNOPFLER ROCKS!
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SING ROCK N ROLL IN THE SHOWER
APRIL 2, 2021 (#2)
As I mentioned the end of
MARCH, few things make me
HAPPIER than music -- singing
it, making it, mixing it spinning
it on KFLY/KSXY and (like most)
listening to it. It's always been
a tradition for me making
 GOOD FRIDAY truly GOOD
by spending a bit more time
sitting, laying, loafing by
the bedroom stereo cubby
(I have two others in my
playroom and zen-room)
spinning vinyl or cassettes
of music made before I was
born. It's something I do
much of but GOOD FRI
is unique and I'll easily
escape for 3 hours into
everything that snaps
crackles and pops -- and I
don't mean RICE Krispies!
There's a kind of GOODness
that flows from an old stereo
and the awesome album
covers, cassettes and casual
time spent sprawled on the
floor, immersed in the music
and the motif of a sweeter
time, when music was made
by people who didn't need
to be pretty to be embraced
by those who made them
#1 on the charts. What makes
your FRIDAY........good?
Or do you just treat it like
every other day? Are you
really HAPPY atm? Are you
doing something to make the
day.......GOOD?
I hate that I missed this
treasure of sitting with my
teenage friends listening to
.....well -- according to every-
one who was there -- every-
thing from ELVIS to KISS,
from DURAN DURAN to
MEATLOAF. I project myself
back 40 years...and every-
thing...is....good. Very Very
Good.......sigh.....
Here's hoping you find...
a good place to be today!
RARE GOOD RAP 4 A GOOD DAY
MORNING TIL NIGHT!

CIRCUSING 'ROUND!

It shouldn't surprise anyone who

keeps up with my blog/site that

I make an GOOD FRIDAY tra-

dition of watching MONTY

PYTHON; and this year I've

cycled back 'round to LIFE OF

BRIAN. (Netflix is flying it!)

APRIL 2, 2021 (#3)
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IT'S SPRING!!
With March now behind us...
we can focus on FUN and start with
APRIL FOOL'S DAY where it's be
come a strange tradition to prank
and play! I'm not sure how skilled
at pranking I am but I'm damn good
at the playing thing! This APRIL
we're gunna create a carnal paradise
APRIL 1, 2021
APRIL'S KICKASS THEME!
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without worrying whether we're silly fools or the brunt of a big celestial joke!
I'm gunna keep being a silly foolish dancer who can't dance to save her life
we're gunna focus on movies, music, art, jokes, pranks, laughter and love
and love of LIFE ITSELF. It's a fresh start after another  long winter and we're
going to get out into the world and love it, life, love, each other.
We're gunna goof off and get everything out of this beautiful
time we can! A HAPPY HEAVEN awaits us as we step through the door &
dance into the SUN! I've been waiting with bated breath to FINALLY get to
use one of my FAVORITE SONGS from one of my FAVORITE singers:
7-DAY-FOOL from Canadian powerhouse JULLY BLACK -- also the badass
whose RUNNING is in my TOP 5 'goto' songs to rekindle my commitment
to living for love, hope and embracing humanity itself. Seven days a week.....
I'mma be a FOOL FOR LOVE! So let's you and me FOOL AROUND and
FALL IN LOVE with life itself! Oh...and orgasms...definitely lots and lots
and lots of sweaty, sizzling orgasms!
APRIL 1, 2021
We are all fools waiting on the
beach for the birth of LOVE.
It's APRIL -- the empire of
VENUS/Aphrodite -- the door to
delights of which we can only
DREAM! Oh to be a goddess
born of the blue tides and
the astral infinites! Oh to have
angels at our beck & call...always...
WE GOT EVERYTHING BUT THAT!